BUTCHER- Diet Coke--- quite possibly the best invention ever....I need stock in the company, if only I could get it in an IV drip.   Remember TAB?  The stuff that burned your throat all the way down?  

Baker:  Oh yeah.. I remember it.  The grandmother of diet drinks.  I wonder if it is still out there somewhere.  Personally I liked the bottles.  Wondering how they came up with that name.  There is nothing remotely interesting or catchy about that name.  However... I remember back in high school.. going out in the dating world.... and there was nothing cooler than saying... “I’ll have a  Tab. “  Yeah.. it definitely sounds cool.  “ I drink Tab.”  Say it with us class.  Saying “I’ll have a diet coke” doesn’t have the right ring.    Tab.  Yeah.. that’s cool.    It makes a statement.    We need to bring it back.    Although... if you were in a bar … and said... “I will have a rum and Tab”.... definitely  loses something.  Tab drinkers need to stay out of bars.. and that’s that.

Butcher:  taB--totally artificial beverage- that is straight from Snopes!  No one drank the stuff because it tasted good, they just drank it for the STATUS of drinking it.  It is still available FRESH from the Coca Cola Company.  $6.99 for a six pack and then $20 shipping.  I tell you that stuff is liquid gold.  

Baker:  NO way!    You are telling me I can get a six pack of Tab for 26.99?
I suppose you can find Fresca out in someone’s warehouse also?

Butcher:  Fresca is still on local shelves.  Grapefruit diet drink, it was before mass marketing took over our world.  I am going to go and buy a 12 pack and sell it for 26.99 a 6 pack, I tell you this is my next get rich scheme.  


Baker: Well as long as were are gathering artifacts... Get some Grain Belt.

Butcher- You are aging yourself again my friend.  Oldest beer I know is Pabst Blue Ribbon.  

Baker : Stick with me sista... I can teach you things.

Butcher- I am a personal fan of Diet Coke with crushed ice from a fountain.  High carbonation= great admiration.

Baker: Nice ring to that. I will guarantee that the Tab and Fresca out there was bottled in the 70’s.

Butcher- The 70’s - the years of great freshness dating, even the 50’s didn’t have that.... look at you Baker.

Baker:  Yup bottled in the 70s’  I was....

Butcher- Able to drink from a brown bottle maybe.....bottled...NO.

Baker:  I don’t have an expiration date...............YET.. Give me a break. I leave when Tab and Fresca leave. Not until.  After all … Tab was thee most disgusting tasting drink ever bottled and it had fans.  There is hope for me.